It’s the Super Bowl, Charlie Brown!

Okay, first things first: I know my headline isn’t the right title for the Charlie Brown Super Bowl episode. I also know this shot of Lucy pulling the ball away is from a different episode. But they both work and I like them, so they are staying.

Anyway, there was a big football game last night if you haven’t heard. For those of you keeping score at home, Green and Yellow beat Black and Yellow, 31-25.

One of the funnier side bets I came across was a bet on what color the Gatorade bath will be. Red was the favorite. Should have bet against it.

Typical of most Super Bowls, Super Bowl XLV was not just a game, but an experience. What goes in to a Super Bowl experience? There is the game itself, the storylines, the hype, the commercials, the entertainment and, of course, the food. I love the 16 or so Sundays during the year I put the feet up on the La-Z-Boy and watch the Bills, but the Super Bowl is different.

I usually watch the Bills alone, or with my brothers. But I can’t remember the last time I watched a Super Bowl alone. It is a social event that transcends the restrictions of normal sporting events.

It reminds me of a scene from “Miracle” before the USSR semifinal game… the announcer (Al Michaels? Ken Dryden?) says:

…there are a lot of people who do not know the difference between a blue line and a clothesline. It’s irrelevant. It doesn’t matter. Because what we have at hand, the rarest of sporting events. An event that needs no buildup, no superfluous adjectives.

I’m trying to withhold a bad joke about the irony of “no superfluous adjectives,” but I think you get the idea. It’s more than football.

The key to a good experience is watching the game with good friends and eating good food, but that’s about the only variable you can control. Everything else is in the hands of the players, the NFL, the performers and anyone with $1 million for a commercial.

The game itself was a good one, and the experience was an enjoyable one as well. But when you look at it, SB XLV is a great example of a whole being greater than the sum of its parts. Now that I think about it, I’m not sure I can say anyone had a great day.

It didn’t start well. Christina Aguilera botched the National Anthem. Give her a break, she’s only heard it a few hundred times. Ronan Tynan for XLVI, anyone?

How about the Packers or Steelers? Pittsburgh had three turnovers and Green Bay nearly blew an 18-point lead. Let’s keep looking.

James Starks? I’m really proud of the guy and he ran well, but his final numbers were nothing special. It’s awesome a WNY guy started in the SB and averaged 4.7 yards per carry, but he had 11 touches and totaled 52 yards. That’s not a phenomenal day.

Jordy Nelson? His final line of 9-140-1 looks good, but how many balls did he drop? Could have been seriously costly.

Ben Roethlisberger looked like a soccer player out there. Ouch my leg! Next play, 18-yard run. Oh, and he did bad things in a club bathroom last summer.

Greg Jennings had two touchdowns.  HE PUT DA TEAM ON HIS BACK. Or he had four catches. Your call.

This video contains vulgarity. Please be forewarned if you choose to play it.

The Volkswagen Passat? The Darth Vader commercial was really funny. Know what’s funnier? The car won’t be available for purchase until July. And the kid has never seen Star Wars (<– commercial video there too).

The Black Eyed Peas? Don’t make me laugh. At first I was like, “Oh no, Fergie’s microphone is too quiet.” Then I was like, “Oh no, her microphone is too loud.” The Peas came on my iPod earlier while writing this, and I couldn’t take it. I had to change it.

The city of Dallas? I thought having the SB at the palace was supposed to show the NFL what a mistake it is going to be having one in New York City. Except it snowed in Dallas. What does NYC–or any northern city–have to lose? (Super Bowl L in Buffalo! Or is that a joke in itself that it’s Super Bowl “L”?)

And how about the NFL selling tickets that didn’t exist? That’s so embarrassing. Word is they repaid the 400 ticket holders either multiple times face value, or $2,400. Only problem is many bought those tickets second-hand for way more than that (plus airfare, hotels, etc.). I don’t care if the NFL brought them on the field after the game or that it gave them free tickets to next year’s SB. That was pathetic.

Shaun Suisham. That field goal missed by what, 30 yards? It was from 52 yards out, but he’s an NFL kicker. I’ve hit from 40.

And speaking of embarrassing, I wonder how Alex Rodriguez feels right about now. I’m a die-hard Yankees fan and I’m wearing a Yankees hat right now. But even I was embarrassed for this guy. If that was me being fed popcorn by Cameron Diaz, I’d be bragging about it because I’m a regular person and that is a hot, blonde actress who happens to be rich and famous. But A-Rod is a somebody, and he can get any woman he wants. No amount of money or time spent with a hottie can heal that embarrassment.

Lastly, who on Earth dressed the commentators last night? Joe Buck and Troy Aikman did not look sharp. Neither did anyone in the studio at halftime. This is the Super Bowl, people! How do you not bring your ‘A’ game? Really, Joe, with that plaid shirt? Really?

Honorable mentions: The Steelers defense, sideline reporters, people who watched Glee after the game, pizza delivery people, anyone that would have won his squares pool if Pittsburgh kicked the extra point instead of going for two, anyone who made apparel in advance that said “Steelers 2011 Super Bowl Champions” on it, chickens that got used for wings, and Brett Favre.

So who were the winners of SB XLV?

Television. A record 111 million people tuned in to FOX for the game, reports say, meaning you made up .0000009 percent of the viewing audience.

Aaron Rodgers played pretty well, and won the MVP award. He wasn’t fantastic, but a lot of his good throws were dropped.

Packers fans are definitely winners. Who cares about anything else? Your team won the Super Bowl! Added bonus for shareholders (or whatever the technical term is since they aren’t a publicly traded company). It’d be awesome to say, “My team won the Super Bowl,” but even better to say, “MY team won the Super Bowl.”

Usher Raymond IV (and to a lesser extent, Slash), simply for the fact that the Peas shut up when it was his turn to perform. Slash would get more credit if Fergie didn’t have to sing/howl along to his song.

Whoever choreographed the dancers at the halftime show. I don’t know (or care) enough about the technical aspects of the dancing and patterns, but I liked the light-up people. Nice touch.

Ticker tape. I always wanted to have the confetti stuff showered upon me. I wonder how much it costs to buy all that tape. Some kids in Mexico probably worked really hard to make it.

John Madden. I guess if you have your own video game, you too can sit with the former president at the Super Bowl. Or is the real winner here George and Laura Bush, who got to sit with Madden? I don’t hold the texting thing against him. I assume he used his phone at some point during the game, and that’s just the shot they used. Not the same as A-Rod. Multiple places online say that Madden and Bush have sat together at games before. Interesting.

Any town that had a player playing in the game. Like Nick said, that is absolutely something to take pride in (read that!).

The NFL Rules Committee. Phew, we never had to try out those new overtime rules! People wouldn’t have known what was going on.

Jerry Jones’ monster scoreboard. This thing had more TV time than Charles Woodson…

…Which brings us to our next winner, the Players’ Union. What’s that you say? An 18-game schedule will cause more injuries? If only we had proof…

It seemed like someone was getting injured every series. That was nuts. That can’t happen. I like the idea of watching more football, but not at that expense. I’ve been injured before, and I wouldn’t wish that on anybody.

This is a reminder that, oh by the way, I hope there’s football next year. I’m going to miss it.

Week 12 NFL picks

Chippewa strip goers, beware of this man.

Pittsburgh comes to the Ralph this weekend, but it won’t be much of a home game for the Bills. The game miraculously sold out, which is most likely due to Steeler fans coming up to Buffalo. One of my teammates put it best: He’d bet the house except he never bets against the Bills.

Pittsburgh at Bills (+6 1/2)–Pittsburgh

Tennessee (+6 1/2) at Houston–Houston

Green Bay (+2) at Atlanta–Green Bay

Minnesota (+1) at Washington–Washington*

Jacksonville (+7) at N.Y. Giants–Giants

Carolina (+10) at Cleveland–Cleveland. I want anyone +10 against the Browns, but I’m intrigued by Jake Delhomme against his old team.

Kansas City at Seattle (+1 1/2)–Chiefs

Miami (+3) at Oakland–Oakland

St. Louis (+4) at Denver–Rams

Philadelphia at Chicago (+3 1/2)–Eagles

Tampa Bay (+7 1/2) at Baltimore–Bucs

San Diego (+3) at Indianapolis–Peyton Manning doesn’t lose at night.

San Francisco at Arizona (+1)–49ers

Feel like I picked too many favorites, but changing picks is like picking children. Okay not quite, but I couldn’t find any I would change.

On a related note, the Bills promoted Naaman Roosevelt this week. Projected stat line: 3 offensive plays, 1 catch, 4 yards, all garbage time. Might get in on kickoff too.

Overall
Northrop: 85-67-5 (7-4)
DiCesare: 82-70-5 (7-4)
Sullivan: 82-70-5 (7-4)
McKissic: 77-75-5 (4-7)
Gaughan: 71-81-5 (8-3)
Wilson: 71-81-5 (8-3)
Game Seven 64-88-5 (8-2-1)

Last week:

Bills (+5 1/2) at Cincinnati–Bengals
Bills 49-31. We won! But Loss
Oakland (+7) at Pittsburgh–Raiders
Pittsburgh 35-3. Loss
Houston (+7) at Jets–Texans
Jets 30-27. Win
Baltimore at Carolina (+10)–Ravens
Ravens 37-13. Win
Washington (+7) at Tennessee–Titans
Washington 19-16 (OT). Loss
Detroit (+6 1/2) at Dallas–Lions
Dallas 35-19. Loss
Green Bay at Minnesota (+3)–Packers
GB 31-3. Win
Cleveland (+1 1/2) at Jacksonville–Browns
Jacksonville 24-20. Loss
Arizona (+8) at Kansas City–Cards
KC 31-13. Loss
Seattle (+11 1/2) at New Orleans–Seahawks
Saints 34-19. Loss
Atlanta at St. Louis (+3)–Falcons*
ATL 34-17. Win
Tampa Bay (+3) at San Francisco–Tampa
Tampa 21-0. Win
Indianapolis (+3) at New England–Colts
Pats 31-28. Push. The news staff doesn’t have any ties, and upon further review, it seems this game was actually a win.
Giants (+3) at Philadelphia–Eagles
Eagles 27-17. Win
Denver (+10) at San Diego–Chargers
Chargers 35-14. Win
8-7

Fantasy football QB rankings

With NFL camps kicking off in just over a week, that means fantasy football draft season is picking up speed… don’t get left in the dust. Here are you pre-camp quarterback projections.

1.       Drew Brees, NO
For the longest time, Peyton Manning and Tom Brady were alone atop the fantasy world. Over the last few years, Brees and Aaron Rodgers have made their way onto the top of the list. I give Brees the nod because I feel he has more firepower to work with than Rodgers and the Packers. There were only two weeks last year, not including week 17, that he didn’t have a touchdown pass (one of which was against the Bills), and he threw for three or more TDs six times.

If you believe in the Madden curse, you’ll want to stay away from the 2011 cover boy. Last season featured a split-cover with Larry Fitzgerald and Troy Polamalu; Fitzgerald played in all 16 games, but Polamalu injured his left knee twice and played in only five games. In the words of Donovan McNabb, “Is it better to be injured and on the cover of Madden, or just injured?”  If you want to find something to knock him for, I’d pick Super Bowl hangover before I plea to the Madden curse.

He has a good offensive system in place for him in New Orleans. He drops back to throw with high frequency, and he set a record last season for completion percentage at 70.6. Will most likely be drafted in the first round.

2.       Aaron Rodgers, GB
I have Aaron Rodgers just behind Brees, although there is good argument he should be first. He was the fantasy points leader for QBs last season, and came in second in ’08. This kid can flat out play quarterback, which he’ll display week 2 at Lambeau Field against the Bills.

Greg Jennings is a stud at WR, but Donald Driver has been on the decline for some time now, which hurts Rodgers. He’s still a good secondary receiver, but look for the likes of James Jones and Jordy Nelson to play a more prominent role in the passing game this year.

Rodgers has good legs and can scramble, but if your league takes off for sacks, you may want to reconsider selecting Rodgers: his 50 sacks last year tied for the league lead. Could be a late first round pick but is more likely to go early second round.

3.       Peyton Manning, IND
If you’re not sure which quarterback to draft, go for Peyton. The elder Manning is the most consistent player in the NFL, if not all of sports.  

He throws more than almost any other player, and set a career high in completions last season. Manning may not go deep as often as he used too, but he’ll make up with a plethora of mid-range passes and red zone touchdowns.

His numbers did decline down the stretch last year (threw for 300+ yards in eight of the first nine games, then only once after that), but he threw more touchdown passes in the second half of the year than the first half, including weeks 17 and 18 where he hardly played. Plus, if you saw this guy in the playoffs, you have no worries about him tapering off.

With guys like Reggie Wayne, Dallas Clark, Pierre Garcon, Austin Collie and Anthony Gonzalez around him, he’s sure to have a great year. Late first round or early second.

4.       Matt Schaub, HOU
Matt Schaub has arrived. He stayed injury free last season and look what happened– he led the NFL in yards, attempts and completions.

Schaub to Andre Johnson is arguably to most dangerous home run threat going right now in the league, and a mix of Ben Tate and Steve Slaton will be enough to keep defenses honest. Tight end Owen Daniels was having a great year before getting injured, and other wide outs Jacoby Jones and Kevin Walter have both been viable NFL receivers at points in their career. 

“Schaub” doesn’t have the glorified connotation to his name like Brady and Manning do (yet), so if you can snag him at a bargain, do so. Second round or early third.

5.       Tom Brady, NE
Tom Brady makes receivers look good. I don’t know how he does it, but that skill will be put to the test this season. Brady’s knee will be stronger this year compared to last, but unfortunately for him, Wes Welker’s won’t be.   

Randy Moss is still a freak who puts fear into all DBs not named Darrelle Revis, but after that, talent at WR is thin. Julian Edelman (who played QB in college) could be their guy, as could Brandon Tate. The Patriots also brought in Torry Holt, who knows what he’s doing, but he’s way past his prime. The deep threat he posed in years past is no more, but never underestimate Brady’s ability to throw him open.

Four games this year against the Jets and Bills secondaries won’t help, but knowing Brady, it probably won’t hamper him. Should be a late-second or early- third round pick, but will go higher because of his name.

6.       Tony Romo, DAL
I think Tony Romo suffers from a case of Alex Rodriguez syndrome. He is a very good player who puts up very good numbers, yet people devalue him because don’t like him as a person or the team he plays for. If Romo is under center in a different city, he gets mentioned in MVP talks and is considered one of the best in the game. He threw for 4,483 yards last year, more than Brees, Rodgers, Brady, Phillip Rivers, and Brett Favre, and was an offensive holding call behind Peyton Manning (4,500). He was also one of just four starting quarterback to throw single digit interceptions.

If you watched football at all last year, you know Miles Austin is a stud; Jason Witten is one of the best-catching tight ends in the league; and between Roy E. Williams, Dez Bryant and Patrick Crayton, Romo will have good secondary targets to hit too.

7.       Brett Favre, MIN
Every year I’ve said Brett should come back. At this point, it would be shocking if Favre decided not to return for another season in purple. He drew a lot of heat last year for saying his Vikings team was the best team he’d ever played on, but if you look at his numbers, it’s hard to argue that. A career low seven interceptions went along with 33 TDs and 4,202 yards. At age 41, science says he should be slowing down, but when has Brett ever done what his body was supposed to do? 

The running game in Minnesota must be respected by defenses, which gives Sidney Rice and Percy Harvin room to operate. Bernard Berrian will also be in the mix, and TE Visanthe Shiancoe is a large target in the red zone. Favre could very well end up higher than seven, but you have to think Father Time nags him eventually.

8.       Joe Flacco, BAL
Flacco may be a slight reach here, but I’ll give you two words why he’ll be a top-10 QB this year: Anquan Boldin. I don’t think Boldin will be a top-10 receiver, but he completes the Baltimore offense and makes the unit that much more lethal (Don’t forget what Jerry Maguire taught us: wide receiver + quan = awesome). His arrival pushes Derrick Mason, Donte’ Stallworth, Mark Clayton and Demetrius Williams back to receivers 2-5, respectively, which is a much better spot for them, talent-wise, than 1 through 4. Ray Rice keeps defenses on their heels and led all RBs in receptions last season as well. 

Flacco didn’t have a great year from a fantasy standpoint in ‘09, but this year will be different. He has always had the poise and arm strength to succeed, and this is the year he finally puts it all together. Flacco’s stock is on the rise, and I’m buying.

9.       Phillip Rivers, SD
For all the hype Rivers is getting this season, I don’t think he’s going to touch top-tier QB status like some think he will. His main hookup is with Vincent Jackson, who was the leading fantasy receiver for the first half of last year before struggling in the final eight games. This season Jackson will miss the first three games with a suspension, which in turn, hurts Rivers as well. 

San Diego also lost LaDainian Tomlinson, which could mean ever more passing, but could also mean more defenses ready for the pass. Again, I think this development makes it harder on Rivers and the Chargers. He has huge upside and put up great numbers last season, but I’d be surprised if he matched last year’s totals. Will probably go round three, but I’d think twice before spending a high pick on him.

10.   Eli Manning, NYG
Manning was up and down at points last season, but he did have a career-best 27 touchdowns and eclipsed the 4,000-yard mark. Steve Smith had a breakout year in 2009, and Hakeem Nicks looks to do the same.

Manning finally looks comfortable as a starter on the field, and at no. 10, he looks to be a starter on your fantasy team, too. The Giants are going to throw, and I like Manning’s chances this year. You can wait on him until rounds 5-8, and if he’s around late, he could be a steal.

11.   Kevin Kolb, PHI
Kolb is a rather unproven quarterback, but he will be under center for the Eagles this season following Donovan McNabb’s move to Washington. Relatively speaking, that’s a good place for a young QB to be. I have trouble trusting my fantasy team to a quarterback with two career starts, but he put up good numbers in both games and aims at being the next great young play caller in the NFL. 

In his first start he put up 391 yards against the Saints, although several of them came with the game far out of reach. The next week he threw for 327 yards in a winning effort against Kansas City, which is good, except it’s Kansas City. Even the Bills beat KC.

Kolb has two good, young receivers in DeSean Jackson and Jeremy Maclin, and Jason Avant is good in the slot. Brent Celek had a stellar year at tight end, and a mix of LeSean McCoy and Mike Bell will provide the ground attack for Philly. McNabb put up great numbers in the Eagles’ offensive system, and I think Kolb will too. He has learning to do going into his first season as a starter, but if you’re looking for a sleeper pick, Kolb might be your man.

12.   Jay Cutler, CHI
This man is an enigma. Cutler went only one game without a turnover last year and totaled a whopping 26 interceptions–more than Trent Edwards has in his entire career. Yet he still managed to set a career high for touchdowns (27) and was a top-15 fantasy quarterback.

You would think it could only get better from here on in, but considering his favorite target is named Aromashodu and his other wide outs are a D-II college player and a DB-turned-WR, it’s hard to say with any certainty. Also worth noting is that his numbers are inflated by a huge (but fantasy-irrelevant) week 17; without which he throws for 3,390 yards and 23 TDs. 

Running back Matt Forte was a bust-and-a-half last season, a contributing factor to Cutler’s poor year. The Bears brought in Chester Taylor to help shoulder to load, which should aid Cutler’s numbers as well. New Offensive Coordinator Mike Martz is known for doing wonders with QBs, although he is also known for getting them injured, too.

There’s a good possibility Cutler has a decent year and finishes higher than the 12th ranked QB. However, there is also a possibility he struggles again and is too inconsistent to put in your starting lineup. He’s hit or miss, and while he’s more likely to hit, there is the threat that he misses and kills your team. It’d be ballsy to draft Cutler as your starter, but if you want to make him your number 2, I think you’d have to draft him awful high for a backup quarterback. My thinking is to steer clear and let him be someone else’s problem, but if you’re the gambling type you could get good numbers at a bargain.


Don’t be that guy. Don’t do it.

13.   Donovan McNabb, WAS
I think it’s against the law to hate Donovan McNabb and his Chunky Soup-loving mother. That being said, he now plays in Washington, whose offensive situation is a lot worse than Philadelphia’s. I don’t care for any of the three formerly studly running backs on the team (Clinton Portis, Larry Johnson, Willie Parker), and the receiver situation isn’t much better.

Santana Moss heads another Redskin group of has-beens and busts-to-be (seeing a pattern here?). Michigan State product Devin Thomas and former Oklahoma Sooner Malcolm Kelly hope for improvement in their third year of NFL service, a year receivers are known for breaking out in, but they might turn out to be more like the Chiefs’ Dwayne Bowe than NYG’s Steve Smith. Receivers 4-6 consist of Joey Galloway, Mike Furrey and Bobby Wade. Still not impressed. Plus, the offensive line in Washington sucks.

While I don’t doubt McNabb’s ability to put the ball where it needs to be, I have major concerns with his receivers’ ability to do their job (and the line’s ability to keep McNabb on his feet, which only adds to threats on him going down with an injury). Mike Shanahan’s teams are hard to count out, but the rest of the Capital is a mess, so why stop here? For the deliciousness that is Campbell’s Chunky Soup with sirloin burgers and garden vegetables, I hope McNabb doesn’t become another washed-up Redskin.

14.   Matt Ryan, ATL
I’m willing to buy Matt Ryan on the rebound after a rough sophomore season. His numbers were bogged down by injuries last year, both his injury and Michael Turner’s. Being number 14 doesn’t exactly sound like a place for a resurgent player, but there isn’t really anywhere else to put him. I don’t think Atlanta has done enough to get players around Ryan for him to be an upper-echelon QB. Roddy White is very good and is one of the most consistent WRs in the league week-to-week, but after White it’s a steep decline.

Second receiver Michael Jenkins didn’t hook up with Ryan for a touchdown all last year, and Turner doesn’t catch the ball out of the backfield (had just five receptions). Tony Gonzalez had a great 2009, but he’s not the Dallas Clark/Antonio Gates type of game changer anymore. 

At 14, Ryan is literally above average… but nothing more. He’ll be one of the better backups, but if he’s your top QB you will want to invest in another passer, and fast.

15.   Chad Henne, MIA
I liked Chad Henne last season for Miami. He made plays the Dolphins needed him to make, and for a rookie, I was impressed with what I saw. However, fantasy bloodhounds are sniffing the tag “game manager,” which typically spells trouble for a fantasy team. His numbers attest: 2,878 yards, 12 TDs, and 14 INTs; scored 20 fantasy points only twice but was held to single digits four times. 

So what changes this year? Just a guy named Brandon Marshall. The Fish brought in arguably the most coveted free agent of the off-season to go along with one of the game’s top ground attacks, which will help Henne tremendously. ESPN projects Marshall to lead the league in receptions with 104. After Marshall, Miami isn’t as thin at WR as you would think.

Here’s a question for you, which receiver going into his third year has the most receptions? Is it DeSean Jackson? Eddie Royal? How about Pierre Garcon, Donnie Avery or Robert Meachem? The answer is actually Miami’s Davone Bess, with 130. Behind Bess on the depth chart is Greg Camarillo, who’s coming off a 50 catch season, and Brain Hartline, who has no real claim-to-fame except scoring two of his three career touchdowns against the Bills.

Henne will lose some game time when Miami goes into the Wildcat and I don’t see him being an elite passer just yet, but look for Henne to come into his own this year. The third-year Michigan product won’t be picked in the first 10 rounds, but he could provide good value to your team.

The next few quarterbacks, in no particular order:

Ben Roethlisberger– Will put up numbers when he comes back from suspension, but players who come late to the party tend not to pick up where they left off. Isn’t that right, Marshawn? 

Alex Smith– I like what Mike Singletary is doing in the Bay area. Could rise into the teens. 

Matt Leinart– Hard to believe Arizona’s QB well has run dry, but Leinart is yet to string together a good month of football, let alone an entire season. Imagine the criticism the Bills would be getting for “ruining” such a prospect if we hadn’t passed on him for Donte Whitner. 

David Garrard– Mike Sims-Walker had a good year last year and any QB who has MJD pounding the rock should see some single coverage. 

Jason Campbell– Didn’t do much in Washington… or did he? Numbers actually weren’t that bad, all things considered. Oakland is only a slight upgrade though, if any.

Vince Young– Won’t put up huge passing numbers but gets it done on the ground as well. For those of you holding on to memories of Mike Vick a la 2002, your best bet is to draft Young rather than Vick himself.